"How was your day?"..........................."I dunno"
"Who did you play with?"......................"I don't remember"
"What did you do during recess?".........."I forget"
It's like pulling teeth just to get one tiny piece of information out of the kid. Seriously? There's nothing you can tell me about your day other than you liked your lunch!
I don't know about you but I am HYPER aware of all the stuff that goes along with starting school and the some of the very real social outcomes: bullying, mean girls, school yard fights, after school fights, little tiffs, big tiffs. I want...need...to know if my kid has friends, if my kid is unhappy or sad, is making friends, or is having trouble making friends. I'd like to know what's going on socially so I could help if necessary. But what to do if the kid doesn't open up?
TRY THIS: Make the questions part of the bedtime routine. Start with very specific but innocuous questions as they brush their teeth (ease them in), and then tackle the more difficult questions when they are snuggled under their covers in bed.
NOT THAT: Okay, never mind....
WHY: Kids, like their parents, differ in how they process information. Some kids process their day by talking about it out loud with anyone who will listen (this is me). But other kids are internal processers (this is my husband). They need time to think about their day -- time to process all the events before they are ready to discuss them. So when you ask your child about lunch, recess, friends, problems, and they reluctant to answer, try waiting. Give them some time to sort out the events of the day and try again at the end of the day.
Great advice. I tried this tonight and it worked like a charm!
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